Tuesday, March 17, 2009

I'm in one of those moods.....

It's Nine in the morning and I could sure as hell use a Strawberry Mango Margarita with extra triple sec and double tequila. It's not that I'm depressed and that I'm an alcoholic but it's already like 90 million fucking degrees outside so naturally it feels like it's around 3 or 4 pm already. I've been feeling pretty blah these past days and I don't know why. I think about a lot of stuff but then again, I have a short attention span so my mind always seems to wander....

But yeah, I'm in one of my moods. I don't know whether to laugh or cry, be bored or be spontaneous. I'm just...."blah"...... ugh, and i fucking HATE IT. It's not in my nature to be sad; right now, I really do just want to go lay on the beach *cough*and order that margarita*cough* and relax until I have to go to work. And while I know that will please me and make me smile immensely, I know the sadness or "blah" feeling will come back. I know what it is. I know what's bothering me.... It's being idle. I loathe being idle. As an artist- actually, scratch that, as a person EVERYONE needs a creative outlet. Mine is acting. I need to be on a set, a stage, anything! I need to be doing something.... I hate just sitting in my house waiting for the next audition. Things aren't moving fast enough for me. I may just start doing extra work again because at least I was happy being on a set. Networking and being around like minded individuals. Artist. Creative people. I need to make some moves.

This is not me giving up nor is this me losing hope because so much is happening for me, but I want more.... I need more.... It's like... Acting is my Addiction....and right now..... i'm itching for another hit.....